Blackstreet - "No Diggity"
In which I confront a big, jangly fear
First of all: the weather goddesses heard my whiny plea in my last post and have brought the summer heat. But they must also cackling wildly because the temps here in NYC are approaching 100. So I guess now I will put out a plea for a solid 75 for awhile? Please?
In the meantime, to celebrate this extra-hot OFFICIAL kickoff of summer, I bring you an absolute jam from 1996. This Blackstreet video is chock full of summer fun: ladies dancing in the street, a beach party, and men somehow making white overalls look cool. And yet it also contains something I hate and actually fear so, so much: PUPPETS.
I think my puppet fear started deep in my youth with Lady Elaine Fairchilde on Mr. Rogers (I mean look at her), but hand puppets are on the low end of my fear spectrum. Once the limbs get more individual and jangly and their mouth flops open like a little drawbridge and their hands are all clattery, I get sweaty.1 Which is to say that the marionettes in this video give me straight-up chills. The only thing saving me from nightmares is the fact that they many of them have sunglasses covering their evil glazed-over eyes and there is enough street dancing and overalled men to make up for it. Hopefully you feel the same way:
We open with a bunch of limos2 as Blackstreet and their lady friends make their way to a top secret party and the dancers start busting moves on the wet pavement. This opening reminds me so much of Aaliyah’s “Are You That Somebody?” that I’m half expecting a bunch of motorcycles to fly by on their way to Aaliyah’s secret dance cave.
These women in front of the limos are the full dance force of this video so I love that they came equipped to really DANCE. Their halter tops are secure (surely there is double-sided tape involved) and they have kneepads AND boots. No one is slipping and sliding on these wet streets, which is very important when there’s this much jumping:
The party people go into what seems to be a small crab shack on a beach, but then they get inside and it’s a roomy club! Blackstreet has some real Willy Wonka powers! Dr. Dre stays outside which is probably for the best. 😬
OK *deep breath* we’ve already seen some little glimpses of puppet Teddy Riley but now he’s fully revealed and EEEEK. I admit that this is some impressive puppeteering to get his little hands to slap the little piano like this, but I still don’t like his clanky drawbridge mouth because it could absolutely BITE MY EARS OFF:
A thought: did real human Teddy Riley specifically shave his facial hair into one of those fine-line “here is my mouth” beards to invoke the shape of a marionette mouth? I know this was a popular look in the 90s but now I will forever associate it with puppets so THANKS A LOT, Teddy!
One style choice I do like: their change from casual blue beach overalls to the more formal(?) white overalls for street dancing.3
Another fun fact: I sang this song for karaoke recently with some pals from work (hi pals from work!!) and I learned two important things: 1) I thought I knew the rap parts but I absolutely did not and 2) they’re saying “BAG it up,” not “BACK it up.”4 I’ve been loudly shouting along the wrong word for literally decades! Wow. It’s especially confusing when the dancers are literally backing it up:
Meanwhile back in the bar… AAAHHH HELP! LADIES, NOOOOO:
OK, I’ve caught my breath, and thankfully we hard pivot away from that fright to get to my favorite parts of this video. First we have Queen Pen looking like a hot real estate agent ready to do business and sell this magic crab shack:
Then the street dance crew shows off even more of their knee strength:
Followed by this little magic trick where they shimmy out of Blackstreet’s arms and kick them away:
And then this moment where they show that pavement who’s boss:
SO GOOD. They make it look easy to jump around on wet pavement but I feel like I shouldn’t try this out in my street after the rain, no matter how strong my knees are feeling.
We end with everyone chilling in their respective party zones: friends still partying in the magic club, Queen Pen and Dr. Dre out on the beach, the dance crew still shakin' it, Blackstreet back in their beach overalls, and thankfully NO MORE PUPPETS. Which hopefully doesn’t mean they’re hiding in a tiny closet waiting to pop out after everyone’s asleep because you know that’s what this one’s just waiting to do:
Guard your ears!!
Thank you for coming on this journey with me, especially if you also fear puppets with jangly limbs. To leave this on a not-scary note, let’s please have a round of applause for this YouTube comment:
I hope your summer is off to a strong start and full of strong air conditioning! Play on, playettes (and players) and I’ll see you next month with more sweet moves.
Love and jazz hands,
Molly
And yet I did make it through the entirety of Team America: World Police, I think because the movie was ALL puppets and I eventually got used to it. Something about jangly puppets alongside humans feels more threatening somehow? Should I go back to therapy??
A peek into my brain: when I made my initial notes for this post a few weeks ago I wrote “Limes??” So when I was making final edits I kept skimming the video over and over trying to find these mysterious limes. But now I think I meant “Limos??” I don’t know what question past-me wanted to answer, but yeah, check out those limos I guess! 🤷🏻♀️ And let me know if you see any limes.
PS: are overalls for men back? Or is that just in my neighborhood? Or did they never leave and I’m just noticing them more? Discuss!
Genius tells me that this could mean wearing a condom or could mean locking down a girl as your girlfriend, but what if it’s actually an ode to a hot girl bagging groceries? I want it to be that.
I'm very, very happy to see this one broken down by you.